There is nothing worse than hooking up with a hot/sexy/fun guy (sans “dating apps”) and forgetting to exchange information afterwards to make it happen again. That being said, there are times that walking away from a alleyway/gloryhole/bath house hookup, knowing you’ll never see the dude(s) again, can be exhilarating, exciting, or just fucking HOT! I’m all for anonymous sex.
The reason I bring up this thought is because, after leaving the Folsom Gulch here in SF, I had the opportunity to briefly suck on one of the nicest dicks I’ve ever wrapped my lips around. The dude and I know each other, and I’ve felt the sexual tension building each time we hang out, but finally I made the jump and sucked on his dick, which he was more than obliged to let me do. I was a total tease though—after one very short minute, I pulled off and let him know that we needed to have a real session sometime soon since the current locale didn’t really facilitate a longer blowjob.
And hence, I come to point A: if you see a hot dude, and you’re into him, GO FOR IT! Shyness is the enemy of hot, fun, sexy times. I realize this is easier said than done, but being an extroverted guy, one of the biggest things I tell people is, I’m actually very shy. What sets me apart is that at some point, I literally tell myself “Fuck it. Fuck what people think. Fuck whatever happens. Fuck everything else, I’m doing this because I want to.” It took a lot of dealing with internal struggles to get to that point, but if you haven’t told yourself “Fuck it” and done something crazy, stupid, or embarrassing, you should give it a try….
Which brings me to point B: Find a way. Find a way to do what you want, not because people tell you to, not because you “should” do it, but because it’s what YOU want. Everyone needs to take care of their own needs, and getting/giving some head or ass is very much so an important need for a man. Being shy just means that you REALLY want it. Think about that for a minute–if you’re shy, it means you want it. Same as that old saying “you always hurt the ones you love” or “[you] wouldn’t be fighting with [insert important person here] if you didn’t care.” So in essence, the shyer you are, the more you want it. So find a way to make it happen!
And this bring me to my final point C: Don’t be afraid to go back and get it! As I said before, the dude who’s dick I finally got to get a taste of only got to have my mouth for a minute (for reasons I can’t really say), but I left and realized very quickly, “I don’t have his number or anything!!!” Many guys would’ve just kept on walking home, but I stood in the street for a good long while fighting the nervousness to go back and ask for his number. But, true to myself, it eventually clicked and I said “Fuck it” and turned on my heel and marched right back to him inside the Gulch and asked. I was rewarded with the promise of a session in the days to come.
Don’t be shy guys. It just limits you. If you’re a person who finds it hard to act the way I’m saying, find a way to say “Fuck it” and commit to going and getting what you want. It’s hard for some, I know. However the alternative means just another night at home with your hand. And if you have a missed opportunity/connection, don’t be afraid to go back and get it. If all else fails you can always try the Missed Connections section on Craigslist! =P