Chronicles of a London CumPig || Grindr – A Place To Find A Lazy Duck


Hey, you horny fuckers.

Hope you all had a dirty week with lots of fun and games, hehe.

I observed this week that apps such as Grindr, etc. make for lazy ducks. Yeah, not fucks but sitting ducks, floating around by themselves in a big cityscape of horny boys.

I’ll explain what I mean:


Here’s a typical Sunday afternoon horny desperation conversation online (true thoughts in brackets). NOTE: this is a fictional conversation.

Guy 1: Hey sexy (yeah he’ll do for tonight)

Guy 2: what’s up handsome (not Prince Charming but looks like he has a big cock)

Guy 1: horny (I’d fuck a donkey if I had too)

Guy 2: me too (I just need something huge up there, I wonder if my flatmate would notice if I borrowed his dildo?)

Guy 1: more pics? (just wanna see his hole really…)

Guy 2: sure, here u go, u? (I need some cum in me, hope he shoots a big load)

Guy 1: nice, here’s my pic (could have been worse)


Guy 2: cool, hot cock (looks big, but what’s it attached to?)

Guy 1: great, wanna cum over (as I can’t be arsed to move from in front of the telly)

Guy 2: u should cum over here sexy, I got poppers (it’s soo cold outside)

Guy 1: ah I have to get up early in the morning (i might just have a quick wank instead)

Guy 2: where are u based anyway (if its too far no way I’m going)

Guy 1: clapham (like 1km away from him, so he can come here)

Guy 2: ah that’s too far for tonight, sorry mate (i had hope he was closer than 300m, he’s not that hot anyhow)

Guy 1: wanna cam instead (I just need to shoot my load and go to bed)

Guy 2: oh I just came… (That’s a good end of this pointless conversation)

Guy 1: time waster (that’s alright actually as I just found my favourite porn clip online)

Guy 2: ciao

Guy 1: bye

Hehe, modern love making–nice. (Quack quack…) In the good old days one would cross an ocean for a good fuck, hehe. Well, at least cross the street.

Anyhow, this week has been good but fairly quiet in my little part of the world: a few sucks/fucks in the office toilets, a nice wank/suck in the tube toilets, met a few horny guys, went to the cinema and watched Lincoln all alone ;-( (hehe) as the hubby is in LA now.

I also wanted to do a special mention to long-time Aussie porn producer/director Mike Esser, who died this week, RIP. Mike directed the first ever porn I was in (15 years ago), called “Exposed” (and no, don’t look for it, it’s absolutely terrible; sorry, Mike).

Oh, I almost forgot–I also filmed a horny little “KUK 8” short video with awesome hot model Matt Brooks, playing with his horny cock and tasting his load in my mouth and beard, hehe. HOT!

Yours truly,

Anton Dickson

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  1. I admit I can definitely be the lazy top but I like to exude my dominance by making them work hard for it.

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