I AM: Bruce Jordan

Julian: Bruce! Hi, how are you?

Bruce: Great, thanks. You?

J: Cold, haha. Wow, the London office is huge!

B: Haha, yeah, it’s a live-work space, so it needs to fit all of us.

J: Very nice. Let’s start? Tell me a little about yourself.

B: Right. I was born and raised in northern Wales, which I guess is like the UK version of Iowa, haha. There’s nothing there except for mountains and sheep.

J: Do you speak Welsh?

B: No, no, my kids do, though! Let’s see. Growing up in that part of Wales I had a pretty conservative upbringing. There’s an expectation that you’ll get married, even though all the men are just fucking each other anyway. So I got married in my 20s, and we popped out a few pups. We had what you could call a pretty liberal marriage. I was messing around with men a lot and she knew. I left Wales in 2004. Haha, I discovered fisting and I never looked back!

I have a degree in Bio Chemistry, and I started in a Ph.D. program, but I never finished; sleaze got in the way, haha. I was going out and meeting men and having too much fun, enjoying life too much to keep up with a doctoral program. So, I left the program and became a sauna worker! There I was, coming out of a doctorate program and I was working in a bathhouse! I’ve had lots of jobs since then: truck driver, forklift driver, metal worker-

J: How butch!

B: Haha, yeah, I’ve had a lot of really butch, blokey jobs. The job I had before I started here, ironically, was as a HIV long-term care specialist. I lost that job, though, because I bareback.

J: What?!

B: Yeah, the place I was working, they didn’t really understand the complexity of modern gay relationships. It came up that the staff found out that I was sleeping with one of the patients, who they knew didn’t use condoms. Basically they said, Well, you don’t practice what you preach, and they sacked me for making a choice; two consenting adults making an informed decision. Liam actually offered to do a scene with me the day that I got offered the job at the clinic, but I knew I couldn’t do it because I just accepted that job; I thought Damn! If only he had got to me before! But then I got sacked and I saw that Liam had advertised an opening for this position, and here I am today. It’s ironic, though, I went from working as an HIV specialist to being the personal assistant to one of the most notorious bareback porn directors in Europe!

J: Haha, yes, that’s quite the transition. So, you’re Liam’s personal assistant. What does a typical work day look like? I don’t imagine that you make coffee and pick up dry cleaning!

B: Coffee runs, no! Liam doesn’t drink coffee, but I do! And so does Willem. They’ve taught me to brew a proper coffee, none of the instant stuff for them. I used to think the instant stuff was good enough!

J: Hah, what is a “proper” coffee?

B: Oh you know, that metal thing on the stove.

J: Oh a moka pot!

B: Yes! Oh god, a typical day? Usually when people ask me what I do I just say the office pig, only half joking haha. Let’s see, every day I come in and check the e-mail correspondence; I do a lot of organizing for the shoots: booking locations, booking models and making sure they show up on time, making sure the models are happy; I oversee model interviews and process the model applications. I do a lot of recky for locations-

J: Recky?

B: Yeah, like, going out and looking for a location, looking at a location we’re considering.

J: Oh! Like reconnaissance!

B: Yeah! What do you guys call it over there?

J: I think casting just calls it “scouting a location.”

B: Ah, yeah, yeah. But, um, yeah, I used to do a bit of camerawork for Liam too. I shot in Berlin when we were over there, I did some shoots here in London. Actually the first scene I shot was in a public garage that we rented out, so we could hear the people coming in and out as they were parking their cars, and I’m sure they could hear the men sucking cock and fucking! I had this horrible fear that someone would start banging on the garage door right when the men were cumming!

J: You say that you used to. Why don’t you anymore?

B: Camerawork is very distracting. When I’m filming, I’m concentrating on this one little screen of sex, and making sure that everything looks good, and I can’t participate! I’m too much of a horny bastard to be able to work in those conditions; watching hot men fucking each other. These days, if I’m filming sex, it’s with an iPhone, and if I want to join in I can just jump into the action.

J: Yeah, I understand! Truckee was saying somewhat the same thing to me last week. What’s the office environment like over there?

B: The more time I’ve spent here, the more I’ve felt that we’ve all become a cohesive team, more like a family. You know, it’s a bit like a Priscilla, Queen of the Desert affair here. We spend a third of our days with each other, and to not form close relationships, to me, would mean that we’re not good people. We do things for each other, we help, we laugh, we become friends. Oh, and Willem likes to suck me off under the desk, hahah!

J: What do you find attractive in a man?

B: I’m sure you hear this lots, especially with our set, but there’s not really a set “type” that attracts me. I’m attracted to men who are adventurous, imaginitive, sleazy fuckers. If that box is ticked first, then everything else is negotiable. I like piggish men. The men who fit that description tend to have beards, body and facial hair, they’re a bit blokey. I like men who are in shape, but aren’t ripped or muscular. I find that men like that are so far up their own ass that the sex isn’t fun; I like medium to smaller sized hands, haha; I’m not really a fan of head hair. I like bald men. Sexually, I love to dom over a tall guy. There’s something about me being a small bloke and dominating a man bigger than me that really gets me off. And the other way around, too, I love subbing for a smaller guy; gingers! Oh god, I love ’em. Find me a ginger lumberjack, unshowered, with that man musk smell, with a big ginger beard, and hairy chest, and I’ll be a quivering mess on the floor.

J: Nice! What about your hobbies? What do you like to do outside of sex?

B: That’s difficult, because these days my life revolves around sex. I work here, I live with two full time escorts, and just my own proclivities. It’s difficult to separate myself from anything not to do with sex. Not to sound full of myself, but men are starting to recognize me. I’ll be standing around, and an obviously gay man will be standing there, smiling and staring. Let me see, we go to Bingo a lot, haha! Every Monday actually. And I don’t mean a few old women in a room, I’m talking proper, full on gay Bingo with a bunch of men getting pissed and a drag queen calling out the numbers. I used to go to the gym a lot, I need to start going again, but the gym was a good distraction from sex. I’d walk through the doors and put in my ear phones, and nothing else would matter except for the workout. Working out gives me some a space to myself. Of course, in the shower that all changes, haha, but for that hour or so in the gym, that’s for me.

J: You’ve lived all over the UK, what has been your favorite place so far?

B: I’d say Manchester. When I was there was a time of very significant change for me. It was where I discovered I could let go and choose the kind of sex I have rather than be dictated to by the person I was with. It’s probably the most liberal place I’ve lived outside of London.

Then I’d say Bristol. Not for the same sentimental reasons, though; it’s just such a cool place to live! Some of the best graffiti I’ve ever seen was in Bristol! Art, and music, and the cultural scene is really big over there. And actually, it’s where I got into cottaging.

J: Cottaging? Like cute little houses?

B: No, haha, cottage is British for tea rooms.

J: I’m not sure I understand.

B: Public restrooms, haha! Having sex in a bathroom. When I moved to Bristol I had never cottaged before, but it opened my eyes. I remember being spit roasted in a toilet with a man masturbating above me while people walked in and out of the bathroom. In a city! In the middle of the day! It was the most surreal sexual experience I had had up to that point. Later that day I posted the experience to a Facebook group that I had thought was private, but it showed up on my wall! I came home, cum still in my beard, and my boyfriend at the time was, like, what is this about spit roasting in the toilets in the middle of the day! Yea, Bristol was cool.

J: So, it sounds like you’re not very keen on London.

B: I’m still getting used to London, how massive it is. I’m really looking forward to this summer. It’ll be really the first summer that we’ll be relaxing out in the big parks, hanging out in the city as opposed to being in our apartment or the apartment of one of our friends.

J: What are some of your favorite things, like food, TV, guilty pleasures?

B: Ohh. Let’s see, my favorite food has to be a big plate of nachos with a big dollop of chili, and homemade guacamole, and cheese.

J: Guacamole?! I didn’t realize avocados were available in the UK!

B: Avocados? Yeah, they’re the best! I love a good guacamole. Oh and cheesecake! a nice fatty cheesecake with loads of berries on top.

I really like the sci-fi stuff. I watch a lot of Fringe. I tend to not watch shows as they’re on television. It’s frustrating for me to really get into a show, and then two seasons in it gets cancelled. I’d much rather wait for a show to come to a meaningful conclusion, and then watch it all in a big sitting.

As for “guilty pleasures,” I don’t carry a lot of guilt and I take part in a lot of pleasure. Let me think. Oh! When I take the kids to play at the playground, I play like a child. I’ll be on the roundabouts and the swings having a great time! Not to make myself sound like a pedophile, but I’m a 38 year old man who enjoys playing on a children’s playground. When I’m there I’ll see the other dad’s sitting around, bored shitless, and they see me running around, having fun like a crazy fucker. I can tell they want to join, but I guess they don’t have the balls to enjoy themselves like crazy fuckers.

J: How long has barebacking been part of you?

B: I’ve always barebacked, since I’ve been having sex.

[Willem interjects] – Three kids!

B: Hahah, yes, I have three kids! But with my first boyfriend at 16 years old, we never used condoms. When I got married, she let me fuck around with other guys but asked that I wear a condom so that I didn’t bring anything back home. In that instance I obliged. But I was generally pretty cautious. Most of the relationships I had with men were monogamous and it was never an issue. In 2009, however, I had a really catastrophic, shattering break up from a really long term relationship. I never officially counted, but after that breakup I must have taken 1000 loads. I’m not even joking. In April 2009 I was tested and it came back negative. Six months later the test came back positive, and how could it not have? It would have been impossible. That year I went from kind of cautious about who I slept with to take all comers. I was very wreckless. I’ve calmed down a lot today.

There’s obviously a difference between being at home masturbating over this fantasy of anonymous bareback sex with lots and lots of men, and then there’s the reality of it. Once you take that plunge it becomes like an addiction, a necessity. “Normal” changes, and once you go from Old Self to New Self there’s no going back. I wouldn’t change it, though. I like who I’ve become. I like being a pig. A few years ago I would have been embarrassed; embarrassed to have a wet stain on the ass of my pants. Now I find it amusing.