When I was a kid, my dad warned me never to put personal information on the internet. Little did he know I was sharing nudes with older men in chat rooms every night and inviting them to fuck me. Sorry, dad.
Was that stupid of me? Probably. Was I horny? Totally.
I knew the dangers and I did it anyway. I took precautions in case anything ever happened to me, but that probably wasn’t going to help me if the worst happened.
Fast forward to 2022, and our idea of staying safe online is drastically different to what it once was – but we fuck-hungry men probably have an even more carefree view of what we share with random guys in the pursuit of sex.
Am I going to tell you that’s a bad thing? Fuck no. For a start, I’d be a hypocrite if I did. And secondly, I believe we should all be able to share ourselves and our sex online. But it’s important to at least know what the risks are so you can protect yourself from them.
Unfortunately, we need to. Even in the most progressive of countries, attacks on gay men still happen. Homophobes, stalkers, jilted Grindr potentials – there’s no need to be paranoid, but there is a need to be aware.
So here are my top tips for staying safe while being slutty.
Think before you post
You’re going out for the night and you snap a quick mirror selfie for your socials. “Heading out to Club Cockhound tonight, see you there!”
It’s a great way to grab the attention of guys who are going to the same place as you, but it also tells the world where they can find you tonight, and what you currently look like.
Take the photo anyway, but try saving it for the day after, and show it to everyone when you tell them what a great night you had. That way, your whereabouts remain a mystery.
Watch your location
Speaking of your location, sometimes sharing it can be advantageous. Share your location with a trusted friend using your phone’s location app. They can look for you if anything goes wrong.
Always be careful about who you share your location with when chatting on hookup apps, and if something feels off, don’t give your address away.
Beware of the jigsaw
Jigsaw identification is where someone pieces together multiple bits of information about you to make a whole picture.
Your name, your address, your photos, your job — all details which could be found online in different places.
Make sure people can’t add them together and figure out more things about you than you’d like.
Remove yourself from online directories
Online telephone directories like White Pages and 192.com can often contain a lot of information about you – from your name, age, address, and names of your family members.
Most people don’t realise they’re listed on these sites, but the good news is you can remove yourself from them fairly easily by filling out a form on the website. Try Google searching your name and see where you might be listed.
Something’s off? Get help
If you ever feel like you’re in immediate or imminent danger – get help immediately. Often your gut instinct is the right one.
