No “Captain Obvious” in porn…

I’m kind of sick of hearing the phrase “Common Sense”. There is no such thing, especially in porn. You can never be too clear or too descriptive when trying to organize a shoot with a bunch of guys, and here’s why:

1 – They want to make you (the director) happy.

This simple fact will make men do crazy things. The key word being crazy, because they’re not stupid. They just want to do whatever it is they think will make you happy. So if you start a scene and tell the guys, “just do what comes naturally”, most times they will randomly look at you the same way a puppy does when it isn’t sure what you mean; head tilted slightly to the side and a vacant expression in their face. It’s adorable, but it also means, “please tell me what to do.” There’s nothing natural about sticking a camera in someone’s face as they are balls deep in another dude’s ass. So you have to be clear, concise, and ready to step in while filming any scene. Which brings me to my second point:

2 – Guys will do what they think you want.

As such, if you don’t tell them anything, the last thing they’ll do is act naturally. Some guys—those who’ve done this for years, or are expert whor…..I mean escorts, or guys who just love showing off (but even “showing off” can sometimes appear like they are playing for the camera, which, again, is unnatural in my opinion) can totally hold their own and make a scene look hot, sexy, and like a real life session without any direction at all. But these guys are few and far between. Which brings me back around to my thesis statement:

3 – There is no captain obvious in porn.

I started out with how guys act during a scene, but this statement is especially true for what guys do BEFORE a scene. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had a guy show up for a shoot and brag about how he just unloaded in another guy’s ass an hour or two prior. This is not really what I want to hear right before a shoot, especially since the #1 issue I always run into with tops is that they can’t stay hard or cum. You’d think it goes without saying to NOT CUM BEFORE A SHOOT, but it’s kind of amazing how many people still don’t follow this simple guidleine, even after I’ve reminded them not to. This even extends to other aspects, like not trying to schedule a client or fuck date with a dude right after a shoot, or showing up to a shoot after having completely changing their look. I had a dude show up one time to a shoot with belach blonde hair, which he had done that day and decided not to tell me.

I love the guys I work with. Most are real people, with great personalities and amazing traits to bring into this world, but at the end of the day, we are all human. As such, we can be a little dimwitted or short sighted. Take this as a lesson for life – be descriptive, ask a question if you have it, even if you think it’s dumb, and try to be nice when someone just isn’t getting something. Chances are they are just really wanting to make sure they are doing what you like/want/need.

 

p.s. – I realize that whoever made the meme I attached mispelled the word “taught”, but I feel like it goes along with my rant =P

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